You may have heard the phrase “foster fail” before. It might sound a little harsh, but at Ten Lives, we love a good foster fail!
It’s what happens when a foster carer falls in love with their foster cat and decides to make them a permanent part of the family.
We don’t see that as a failure at all, but as a wonderful success story. Every foster find means one more cat has a loving home and one more person has discovered the joy of sharing life with a feline friend.
Sometimes a foster carer forms a deep bond with their cat and can’t imagine letting them go, and we completely understand. Whether it happens with your first foster or your twenty-third, the feeling is just as special.
When It Happens the First Time
For Lani Crofts, fostering began as a way to dip her toes into cat care. Having never had a cat before, she wasn’t sure if she was ready to become a full-time cat parent, so she reached out to Ten Lives to learn more about our foster program.
“I figured that I could make a difference to kittens and cats in need by providing them with a safe, cosy and affectionate home whilst I got a taste of sharing my life with a feline friend to see if we would be compatible companions!” Lani says.
It turned out to be a match made in heaven. She couldn’t bear to part with her first foster, Brussels, now named Finn.
“I knew Finn was special from the moment I opened the door to his carrier, and he immediately walked out and sat next to me on the floor purring,” she says.
Lani was meant to have him for only six days before he was ready for adoption. Each day she grew more attached, soon gathering toys and even a cat tower. She adored Finn but knew he was only meant to be a short-term guest, until she realised she couldn’t imagine home without him.
“The next step was asking Ten Lives if I could adopt him…” she remembers. “We haven’t looked back since!”
…Or After Twenty-Two Cats
For Bronte Mason, the story unfolded differently. She and her family had been fostering cats for years before their fail came along.
“We started fostering because it had been a while since we owned a pet and we missed having animals in our lives,” Bronte says. “We liked the idea of having the joy of animals in the house without the long-term responsibilities.”
Over time, Bronte and her family fostered 22 cats, each one unique. She loved the excitement of bringing home a new kitty and discovering their personalities.
“I really enjoy gaining an understanding of their likes and needs, and winning their trust,” she says. “It’s a convenient way to enjoy having a pet in your home whilst working around other commitments such as travel.”
Then came foster number 23, a beautiful six month old calico named Olwen, later renamed Chloe, or simply ‘Kit’.
“We’d had a few almost foster fails but the match never quite felt right. Chloe was unique because she ticked all the boxes and fitted into our family perfectly.”
Now an adored family member, Chloe greets them at the door, rolls over for belly rubs, and shares beds between Bronte and her kids.
“She’s undemanding, playful, affectionate and has a lovely loud purr,” Bronte says. “The only negative is that my indoor plants are suffering as she enjoys climbing them, but she’s worth it!”
When Fostering Becomes Forever
Whether you’re like Lani, who fell for her very first foster, or like Bronte, who met her perfect match after two dozen cats, one thing’s certain: there’s no shame in a foster fail.
Lani says adopting Finn was life changing.
“It turns out ping pong balls and shoelace strings are his favourite things of all time, apart from food. And maybe me,” she laughs. “I can’t imagine my evenings without him on the bed purring at my feet, or my mornings without his enthusiastic greeting.”
Bronte agrees that every foster teaches you something, even the ones you let go.
“You learn so much about cats in general, work out how to bond with a range of personalities, and feel like you’re doing something worthwhile,” she says. “Be prepared to experience a range of emotions and perhaps shed a few tears when you return them for adoption. And if you do happen to succumb to a foster fail, your life will be all the richer for it.”
Still Making a Difference
A foster fail doesn’t mean your fostering journey with Ten Lives has to end.
If your adopted cat is happy sharing their space, you can continue fostering, and if not there are plenty of other ways to help.
Lani, for instance, now volunteers with our creative team.
“Since I can no longer foster, I now assist with making sure other kitties who come through our doors have a chance at finding their forever homes through spreading the word (and pictures of their adorable selves) on our social media,” she says.
And Bronte plans to return to fostering soon, this time with Chloe’s help.
“I’m very much looking forward to seeing her build relationships with some new foster kitties,” she says.
At Ten Lives, we don’t see foster fails as failures. We see them as happy endings. Whether your connection happens straight away or after years of helping others, a foster fail means one more cat has found their forever home, and one more person has discovered just how life-changing fostering can be.
Because in the end there’s no failure in love, only success stories with whiskers.
Find out more about becoming a foster carer for Ten Lives this summer at tenlives.com.au/foster
Can’t foster? Here’s how else you can help…
Bring your skills to Ten Lives and become a volunteer.
Check out our current cats and kittens awaiting adoption.
Support us by making a donation to the centre.
This story was featured in the Summer 2025 edition of the Scratching Post, which you can read here.
